the reciprocity of being here
7 min readFeb 11, 2021
Being in a beautiful place does not mean I feel beautiful. Sometimes the saturated world seems to stop at my flat edges.
I was depressed in Baxter State Park last summer. Depression, I have learned, usually implies I am blocking up an experience rather than letting it flow. Usually this experience is sadness, which I reflexively try to hold back. I block the river and then I suffer in the drought.